being is not fitting

The words don't come any easier 37,000 feet up. I keep getting turned around in my head. Even the guy next to me on the plane is asking me... "so... what's it about?" Is it really that bad that I don't know? Am I useless without intent? It's not enough that I'm here, tapping the world on the shoulder intending to shout, but praying I don't come out just a pathetic whisper? I intend on conversing. Just as I step out to take on the day... having no idea who I'll meet, talk to, bump in to, see... really, do any of us have pre-meditated "intent" in those moments? It's just you being you, and it's just me being me.

Why is it so different to put a pen to paper as though they just bumped in to each other? To follow what surfaces inside and walk with it... until it has to get going, pick up its kids at school, head to a meeting, or catch up with you later? I can't spell the sound I just heard some of you make in my head... y'know, the pppffffst sound... the one that goes hand in hand with the severe rolling of eyes... "what the hell are you talking about?" kind of pppppfffst. "First of all it's nonsense... and even if it weren't, who has the patience for that..." you continue pppfffsst'ing... "who cares??" Ok stop. Did you see that? The look I just made... let's paint that the backdrop here.... Have you ever thought about how long the same words have been circling through our mouths, ears, minds, phones, computers, televisions, and radios..... for centuries. Ever wonder where things anew come from? From within. A seed, fostered by curiosity and imagination. An open sky and plenty of water. By letting what is within have a say, a place, even just a moment to be. Sometimes I wish I could just get people to understand - shake them and say... "c'mon just roll up the rim!"

Yeah, that's right... every year Tim Horton's has their roll up the rim contest. Under the lip of every cup there is either nothing... or something... and as we find every year goes by... prizes remain unclaimed. New cars, laptops, cash. How is that even possible?! Maybe some people didn't take the time to roll up the rim. Or, they did and in the hustle and bustle threw their winning cup out with the trash. In the same way that prizes go unclaimed... so too... does everything within.

Our seeds struggle. Trying to sprout - but just can't. Whether we are too busy, or too cluttered with focus elsewhere. Too busy defining our... intent... and then redefining it at every other turn in life. This is not to say re-defining goals is not healthy and imminently valuable... I am talking about the pursuit of the constant fit-in. We're doing what we should, right? Because being really means fitting, doesn't it? It does, I know. It so often does.

So grab the dice - shake 'em good and maybe the next sentence will sound new. I worry we are failing ourselves as we realize it's no longer about the creation of a work, but the re-work of creations past. Re-arranging words, putting commas in new places. Is this our future? Or are we willing to work the land within and dig a little. It's not a question.... but a statement... and we all know someone in our life who will act on it, and we continue to love and be-friend those we know just won't.

Stop fitting, start being. Tap the world on the shoulder, and walk awhile... because you may just have something new to say. And even if you don't, we'll catch up with you again later.